Some say relationships are hard while others state that marriage is beautiful. But what makes a marriage stand the test and taste of time? What makes them fail? What makes them prosper? For celebrities, fame and fame and fame, could be the main factor. Money is another factor.
Again there is this compromising factor, the “for better or for worse” thing, the dirty garage, the sock and tie on the couch, toilet seat left up or messed, or the make-up smudges on the mirror.
It is actually hard to maintain a marriage as it is about two different cultures, remember the weaker one is always defeated.
Moreover, it is hard as a celebrity couple or even dating a celebrity because all eyes are on you, as you somehow role model to some.
Celebrities and those of famous kind often receive everything from awards to critical acclaim and public notoriety, but one accomplishment that may not come to mind is the honour of a long-term relationship or marriage.
In 2013 our celebrity couple hip-hop singer Desmond Chideme, affectionately known as Stunner, broke up with Pokello Nare — Queen of Swagger — and this hurt some of their fans as they were described as one of the role model celebrity couples.
The following year musicians Pauline Gunidza and Rockford Josphat (Roki) called their marriage quits while in Hollywood two years later Brangelina (Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie) got us shocked when the news of their divorce came out.
In the Zimdancehall world Bounty Lisa divorced Soul Jah love early last year on allegations that she was being abused by the chanter.
It is true that most celebrity relationships tend to not go the distance.
But while these and other couples are fiercely protesting media reports that they have visited divorce lawyers, their families have refused to back up their “togetherness”, and the two haven’t been seen together looking their usual loved-up selves for quite some time.
And celebrity affairs are known for a lot of things, but a breeding ground for successful but long-term marriages definitely isn’t one of them.
Between dual careers, fighting egos and the prying eyes of the paparazzi, many of our favourite celebrity couples just didn’t have what it takes to go the distance.
But that said and done, there are a surprising number of star couples who have made their love last.
Some, like Baba naMai Charamba, Selmor Mtukudzi and Tendai Manatsa, Beyonce and Jay Z, Kim Kardashian and Kanye West and Felicity Huffman and William H. Macy, have said open communication is key, while others like Victoria and David Beckham, believe fights are inevitable, but should make the relationship stronger in the end.
Recently Ghananian tailor and designer Elikem Kumordzie seems to have failed when it comes to such issues especially with our local women.
Reports have indicated that after divorcing the queen of style Pokello he got hitched into another relationship with Edith Chibhamu whom he dumped with allegations of infidelity.
Has the former Big Brother — The Chase housemate failed in marriages or he is busy playing games with our local women?
What is he generally after, after-all before the fame he was just an old boy next door busy playing with cloth not forgetting goat rearing? The herdboy-cum-tailor, must have overrated himself, to think he could tend women, the same way he did with goats, before going to Big Brother.
A survey also revealed that some tend to enter into those relationships for status or to gain something in return or making a name while some enter for real love and they have stayed together so strong whether one is a celebrity or both celebrity status or even after married one then definitely becomes a celebrity.
Whatever their secret sauce may be, Saturday Herald Lifestyle went out to find out what is the secret for those who still surviving and those who have bite the dust what could be the cause?
Again there are some marriages who failed to stand taste and test of time.
Gospel power couple Pastor Charles Charamba and wife Olivia said it is about God’s grace they are still together.
“Though we have some facts on how we continue as a couple in peace, I can say it is about God’s grace. We have been built up by a common mindset. We mutually negotiate with each other when it comes to the shaping of family objectives. We don’t argue about how to handle money relating with relatives, disciplining the children and many other areas,” said Pastor Charamba.
He said that they don’t let materialism dictate their marriage.
“In as much as we highly consider being modern, we are not ashamed to be counted as old school. We are just too sincere with each other,” he said.
So when news broke out that United Kingdom-based businesswoman Olinda Chapel and musician Tytan (born Njabulo Nkomo) were in love, it was shock of the town with some stating that it was a publicity stunt to market a new album while others said Chapel who was then dating Stunner wanted Tytan as “pain-killer” as the hip-hop singer sang in one of his songs, “…zvinorwadza seiko kudanana nemunhu ane mumwe munhu kuitwa painkiller”.
Day, months, years later the two are still together going strong.
Tytan said their secret was good communication.
“To be honest, me and my wife we are different people. We sometimes quarrel but later find common ground. The best part of our love and life is good communication and we have realised that we are best friends and this has saved our relationship,” said the “Mukoko” hitmaker.
He added that they have survived this long because they don’t view each other as celebrities but as a normal couple.
“Hangasa” songstress Selmor Mtukudzi and hubby Tendai Manatsa said theirs seems like lovers paradise as it is all good and exciting on stage and at home. After, all their parents, Zexie Manatsa and the late Oliver Mtukudzi groomed them well and had a close childhood relationship.
They couple always flaunts their PDA (public display of affection) a lot and checking mostly on their tours even holidaying.
Is it because the two come from the same background where their fathers where best friends and they inherited that?
Manatsa said that it is about friendship and love at first sight.
“We are best friends that’s all,” he said.
For controversial dancehall musician and Bounty Lisa estranged wife to Soul Jah Love, (Saul Musaka) the case is different.
Despite the two going separate ways, Bounty Lisa accused Jah Love of drug-induced physical battering on her.
At one point, she claimed to have been attacked by the “Mind your Hokoso” hitmaker with fists and an iron bar.
Big Brother Africa finalist Munyaradzi Chidzonga AKA Diamond Boy, said for him and his wife Adiona Maboreka its all about good communication and great sex.
“Love is a commitment not an emotion. You should be able to say sorry when you are wrong. It is about friendship, prayer, communication and lots of sex. That’s what keeps us going strong,” he said.